Originally posted here by Emma Gray at HuffPost Women

"Look, you're not ready to have a baby."

This is the message that blogger (and fairly-new mom) Tracy Moore spells out for readers in her recent piece on Jezebel -- specifically those thinking about having children in the not-too-distant future:

Ready!? Pshaw! Anyone who thinks they are actually ready to stare this beast directly in the eyes isn't wearing her cervical thinkin' cap. It's like, can you be "ready" for a cyclone? Can you be "ready" for the moon? Can you be "ready" for a dinosaur eating a cupcake?

Moore goes on to suggest a list of drills that future parents should undertake to test their own preparedness for the rigors of child-rearing. These include:

1. Wake up every two hours at night, punch yourself in the face, walk around for 28 minutes pleading in jibberish. Go back to "sleep." Repeat.
2. Socialize with friends in 18-second increments.
3. Practice asking for the check, boxing up your food and exiting a restaurant in under sixty seconds -- two bites into the meal.
4. Watch 38% of any film or television show; never see the ending or resolution.
5. Hire a makeup artist to make you up to look 10 years older. Look at yourself in the mirror, then laugh, cry, laugh, cry, laugh, cry. Do not go get a drink.
6. Imagine a mental written list of your responsibilities for each day, tear it in half, burn one piece, take a (literal) sh*t on the other one. (Sorry.)

Reading this tongue-in-cheek (sort of) "you'll never really be prepared to have kids" blog got me thinking about all the reasons that it's awesome to NOT have kids. I personally would like to have children at some point down the line (at least I'm pretty sure), but right now I'm content to live a life that just wouldn't be possible if I was financially and emotionally responsible for another human being.

[Continued...reasons why I don't have kids right now]