Stories 

Whether it’s sailing the South Pacific, landing your dream job or closing on a sweet pad, every DINK has a story; post your story.

Transition from Wanting Children to DINKs

When my wife and I got married (we celebrated our 10th anniversary last month), we both definitely wanted children. About two years later, my wife was in tears one night and said, "What would you say if I told you I didn't want children?" I responded, "I'm actually quite relieved because I've been trying to tell you the same darned thing."

After this conversation, we had many others regarding whether or not we wanted children. We felt selfish in a way because most of our reasons were relating to our freedom and desire to keep our money for ourselves. Neither my wife nor I come from any money, and since we'd both started decent jobs and had some flexibility to travel and do things we never were able to do before, children didn't fit.

My wife was especially scared to tell her mom, but her mom replied, "If that's your decision, it's probably best you at least made it (the decision) before you made a mistake."

My mom said to us several months after we'd made our decision, "You aren't going to have children, are you?" I responded, "Well, it's funny that you mention it, because no, we're not." My mom was also supportive and said if we didn't want children then we shouldn't have them.

Both of us were surprised by our parents' responses, but they've always been supportive.

Because we're sure the decision was final, I made an appointment to get snipped. The first thing the Doc asked was, "How many kids do you have?" Of anyone, he probably had the right to ask. I looked him straight in the eye and told him none and that I wanted to keep it that way. I explained the conversations from above, and he knew I wasn't making the decision hastily. About 2 hours later, I was fixed, and my wife and I are both enjoying our childfree lifestyle!

We both love kids, but we love sending them home even more. When we're in a restaurant with children screaming, we laugh at each other and say "Thank you, Dr. Rice!"

I don't get a lot of questions about not wanting children but usually get told "You'll change your mind" when I do respond that kids aren't for me (us).

When either my wife or I are asked, we usually respond, "Don't have kids and don't want them. We love kids but love sending them home. My dog doesn't want to go to college and won't ever come home late or get knocked up." We sometimes add "my dog only talks back when we want her to" or other humorous comments. People might think we're joking, but the joke's on them!!

As DINKs, we do have some friends with children admit that they’re a bit jealous. They say they’d never ever give up their children but that our freedom and flexibility is worthy of a great deal of envy.

As many of you, we have nice things, travel, entertain frequently, and we enjoy every minute of it. We even built a home theater and sports bar in our basement. My best introduction to the bar is, “We don’t have kids; we have toys. Some people have boats or motorcycles. We have a sports bar and a theater.” Hmm… I wonder where the envy comes from…

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COMMENTS:

Thanks for sharing your story! Always a pleasure to hear tales from like minded people. Glad to hear you're confidently living and making the most of your life as DINKs!


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