I feel for you. It must make you sad that this personal choice has affected your family so negatively.

I'm happy to say that no one in either of my families (incl. in-laws) seems to care whether or not we have kids.

Thankfully not. Although 3/4 of the parents/in-laws would like us to procreate, none of them are forceful in their views. The extent of it was at our wedding, my husband told me that my dad whispered to him "don't make me wait too long for grandchildren" which made me pretty angry at the time. But, he's never said a word since... and I think maybe he's figured it out since we have been together over 8 years and we are in our late 30s and nothing has happened. :-)

It is extremely common for parents to push their views on their children and disown them if they don't acquiesce. In fact the opposite (loving acceptance) seems to be less common, as sad as that is! Once again goes to show that the people having kids are not the ones who give any thought to anything... they just go along and do what they are told, or what has "always" been done, and think everyone else should do the same. :-(

Thankfully it hasn't affected my relationship with my parents. I think even though they're rather traditional, that because Ive always been a bit out there and marched to the beat of my own drum, somehow they were totally prepared. That plus they have Childfree friends so it's not that foreign a concept.

My inlaws are accepting, my wife was like you and knew it from an early age, though they would like kids.
My parents not as much.

Sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. I don't think its right for parents to continue to medle so aggressively after you became an adult.
They certainly don't always know best.

Oh yes, that is certainly true - my parent's world revolves around my sister and my niece. Every post on FB is about one of them. I think most people don't even know my parents have another daughter, LOL.

Luckily no. I think my mother would have loved for me to have a child or two. But I've known for a long time I'm not meant to be a parent (to humans anyway). And I married for the first time at 38--so now I'm old enough that people assume we won't have them. My husband's parents have 7 grandchildren already, so no pressure there. The siblings sometimes hint at it though. My brother's wife is still young and wants children--she can provide the grandchildren!

Since it was obvious that my folks hated being parents, I think they were envious of my choice, especially my father. They didn't give a rat's ass about the grandson from hell from my older sibling, but my dad loved to brag about his grandkitties from me, especially at weddings. Besides, the grandkitties were a lot more behaved & my folks loved being the critter sitter when need be.

I did not have the same problem. My parents have two other daughters and so they have grandchildren. Besides, my parents learnt early on that they cannot influence what I choose to do.

I don't understand why your parents think that your life decisions should be about what they want. That is selfish. Not wanting kids didn't ruin your relationship with your parents. Your parents ruined your relationship with them.

When I was growing up, it was always about "expectations" from my mother, such as being expected to marry when you're a certain age (which I foolishly did), expected to buy hundreds of dollars on Xmas gifts on my parents (which I did against my then-husband's wishes), & expected to bear babies, which I did NOT do. Whether I pissed off my mom or not, well, she never said. She was probably glad I didn't being that their only grandchild from an older sibling was, & probably still is, a hellyen.
When I was about 11 yrs old, we had a bird nest in the backyard tree. Mama bird was keeping her little eggs warm through all sorts of windy weather. Finally, we saw little beaks peeking from the top of the nest, & soon mama & daddy bird were out finding food for their little ones. Then one day daddy bird was nowhere to be found, & my mom said "how terrible that the daddy bird flew off & abandoned the babies.." to which my father replied "boy, was he smart.". I never forgot that comment. That told me right then & there that my dad loathed being a parent & kids are a big pain in the ass

I was really lucky... my older, conservative, hispanic mother ALWAYS used the word if. IF you get married, IF you have kids. No expectations.